Fall 2014 fashion: Scout’s ham costume from To Kill A Mockingbird
A man just walked past me and said “excuse me, but you look very nice tonight darlin” I said thank you and he said you’re welcome and walked off. And that is how you compliment a woman without harassing them
No, that is still unsolicited, and thus, harassment. No amount of “darlins” is gonna make me not want to punch your ass for coming on to me without provocation.
UR SO STUPID
How come Beyoncé wears crystal-studded leotards, 6” heels and fishnets, but she dresses Blue Ivy, her baby, in regular baby clothes? It really makes you think.
How come Beyoncé chooses to drink alcohol but doesn’t have Blue Ivy drink it? Why is Blue Ivy always being carried around? Why is she so short?
one time when i was like 12 my dad wanted me to put a dvd in the dvd player and i was like ‘what do i get in return’ and he said ‘you can have half of the winnings of this stupid lotto ticket’ and he ended up winning 600,000 dollars and i was so pleased with myself. 300,000 dollars when youre 12 is pretty much like infinity dollars. he was so mad
Shit, man, $300,000 would be like infinity dollars to me now.
straight girls, do ur thing and all, but lemme just ask, why???
I want a relationship that’s just like super cool friendship with like kissing
tip for 6 year olds: dont do TOO well in elementary school, your parents will expect those 5 years of grades for the majority of your school life
my stomach pain from the chemo got so bad the doctors gave me medical weed haha omg
If you want to be friends with me you don’t have to be “Hi, um, can, ya know, we be friends?”
It is 1000000000000000000000% percent ok if you just go into my inbox can go. “Man, I am so fucking pissed off at fucking Larry.” And I’ll most likely respond with, “Oh shit! What did Larry do now?”
my grandma said if i worked hard to beat my cancer and do everything the doctors said she’d buy me any pair of tiffany and co. earrings i want but i’m looking at their store rn and they’re all so expensive holy shit i feel so guilty
im afraid your son is completely obsessed with birds…we cannot bring him back…im sorry…he is a lost caws
when boys have sleepovers do they sleep in the same bed like girls do or do the rules of no homo include sharing beds